You know, it occurs to me that perhaps I should be shopping right now. I exercised extreme control over the last two weeks, wrote down all my stupid little expenses, and ended up still with money in the bank when my next paycheck came around. This means I need to spend spend spend, right?
Shut up. I can sense that whatever you just said, or thought, it was THE WRONG ANSWER.
So LALALA I am sticking my fingers in my ears and going over to another website to buy those new sheets I have been yearning for (you know anyone else who yearns for such pedestrian items? me neither. the very dorkiness of my wants and desires should absolve me!) and thence to another website to buy some perennials for that patch of garden I double dug last fall like I goddamn knew what I was doing ( I do not) and thence perhaps to buy a t-shirt or two.
ANOTHER reason (like I need one!) to reward myself is that I had my first performance review today and I RULE. That’s all I have to say about that.
I think I deserve a twenty minute make out with the individual of my choosing for THAT ALONE.
You know where else I have not been in like MONTHS? The beach. people, I live on Cape Cod. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME.
I am clearly a little high strung and loose-cannonnish right now, judging from my fondness for the CAPS LOCK KEY so perhaps I will engage in some therapeutic house cleaning. Or go run around the block. Or down the beach.
OR MAYBE I WILL CUT OFF ALL MY HAIR BECAUSE IT DRIVETH ME NUTS.